Sea of Pain (Blood and Sand Book 4) by Heidi Stark

Author:Heidi Stark [Stark, Heidi]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Publisher: anonymous
Published: 2023-04-27T23:00:00+00:00

Chapter Eleven

Aidan

“I’m glad you’re okay.” Angel gazes at me, her eyes intense and her brow furrowed.

“I feel like an idiot for letting him lure me there. It could have ruined everything. I just couldn’t—.” My voice trails off.

“What couldn’t you?” she asks, placing her hand protectively on my shoulder.

“I couldn’t bear the thought of you being taken by him. By him giving you more scars. Of him…” I pause and I can hear my voice wavering even though I try to hold it steady, “of him taking you from us.”

Her hand squeezes my shoulder. “You bear so much responsibility. I can see it weighing you down,” she says, running her hand down my arm. “It must be exhausting being the voice of reason all the time, when everyone just wants to go out and burn the world down. Feeling like you’re responsible for everything.”

I exhale deeply. “Yeah, I like that they always want to take action, to protect what’s ours,” I say, talking about the other guys. “But sometimes the way they go about it isn’t in our best interests. I need to reel them back so we think things through. It’s okay, I’m used to it now. It’s not like it started with them.”

“What do you mean?” She looks confused, which is fair. I am being cryptic.

“I’ll tell you one day,” I say, running a hand through my hair. “Now’s not the time. Just know that I’m used to being the one who figures out what needs to happen next.”

I don’t want to go into it right now. She doesn’t need to hear about my sad childhood. About how my parents couldn’t care less about my siblings and me. I was second-oldest, but for whatever reason, I became the one who made sure everyone was okay all the time.

I protected them, and I protected myself. Made sure everyone got to the doctor for check-ups and when something was actually wrong, made sure we were all fed and clothed.

Forced my siblings to go to school when my parents couldn’t have cared less whether they received an education or stayed holed up in their rooms playing video games or running around shoplifting and getting up to other mischief all day.

They were so wrapped up in their work and their social status, absorbed in their adult lives, full of parties and high society and all that crap, we were just a burden. I think they liked the idea of kids more than actually having them. Being able to say they had four children made them more normal, more palatable, in their social circles. But behind closed doors, there was very little love, very little affection.

My older brother had no idea what the hell was going on, and needed just as much guidance as the younger ones. And so the responsibility to raise my siblings fell to me. I was hardly equipped for the task, but hand on heart, I can say I truly did my best.

When my older brother took his own life while he was still a teenager, it shocked our family, but mainly me.

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